Getting Older

I went out to happy hour for a work function the other night. As the waiter took everyone's drink orders, he asked my co-worker for her id, while apologizing that he had made everyone at the other end of the table show him theirs; therefore, she had to as well. She politely pulled out her id as did the girl next to her. I then placed my order, which he wrote down and walked off to place, no questions asked. 

I put myself in that 2nd bracket now... although much less blonde.



Getting older... yep. I can't really say I am the type who minds that much, but there it is.

And isn't it funny that when you're 20 and life events happen, you realize you're "Growing Up". Now when someone calls me "Ma'am" I realize I'm "Getting Older". And eventually we'll classify it as "Aging". Different terms, different stages, but it's all the same, isn't it?

I've heard people say for years how the body starts breaking down at 30. Funny, I was half way through writing this post when Marty spoke about this very thing at church on Sunday. 30 years old. They make it sound as if the warranty wears out. You know, the minute you hit 30, you're going to need major repairs, as if you're a car or something. I told my mom this, and she said that she had always heard 40 was the number. Great! With all the advances in medicine today and the threshold for breaking down is actually getting lower. Or better yet, I have another level of crappiness to look forward to in 10 years. Nice! Or maybe, just maybe all these people are just plain silly with their magic voodoo numbers! 

But here I am, living proof  at 31 years of age. Being the type of person who still skips down the sidewalk with her kids and does silly jumps in the office at random, I somewhat reject the concept that I'm "getting older". Oh, but there IS a hitch. You see, last year, the year I turned... gulp... 30... my little headaches got annoying enough that I finally saw a doctor about them, and then a specialist and then another. After searching for a cause and trying a few different options, I now take a daily preventative medication (which by the way if I forget to take, onsets a migraine). And then in the fall, while I was still just... that's right... 30... I started having some fairly disturbing hip problems. I've now seen my doctor and a specialist and then another for that. The end prognosis is that for now I shouldn't do stuff to aggravate it, an interim procedure might eventually help, and someday I'll have to have a hip replacement surgery...  oh, and there is nothing I can do to prevent it. 

At 31 years of age I'm already trying to figure out if yoga would be a good exercise technique to implement, not because I'll like it more or it's good for me, but because I don't think physically a lot of other options are viable. I actually teared up the other night talking with Adonai after we watched Wipe Out, because when you watch those shows you laugh and dream about how if you were a contestant on them, you'd be so fantastic and win. But alas, I will never be on the Amazing Race, because suddenly my body won't let me. I feel stupid. I wasn't going to be on Fear Factor anyway, but it's like a little piece of me died. Stupid magic number.

And YET, with all the chagrin that people put on getting older, I TRULY DON'T MIND. Okay, I HATE that my body is breaking down. Ado and I actually have bets against each other on who will need surgery first (him that I'll need my hip replaced; me that he'll need his knee replaced) - that's right, we have that kind of love! But, as for the aging thing - I've never been one to hide my age or my gray (at least not just yet). I think there are a few reasons for this.

Reasons I don't mind getting older:

1. With Age Comes Wisdom - Okay, a little cliché, but it's true isn't it? Wouldn't you rather be a mature adult than a good looking young fool? "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." - Proverbs 31:30
2. I'm a Bit of an Old Soul - Well, we all know my inner-child runs rampant, but I'm complicated okay. I was the 12 year old who could sit at the adult table the whole meal and actively participate in the conversation. I think that being that type of kid let's you be the type of adult who can handle age more gracefully.
3. My Friends are Older - Hee hee, a lot of you are!!! Really though, I've never minded another birthday, because since so many of my friends are 5 years ahead, I'm now just one year closer to being as cool and mature as they are.

4. I Have the Best Husband Ever - You may be perplexed, but truly, Adonai makes aging, like a journey... I can't not want to be on this adventure with him. He talks about how he looks forward to spending our late years together. He complements me, even the physical features I don't find attractive, he does. And because he loves me with a reflection of God's love, I think I love me more. It's sort of like how I'm an Amazon Woman who enjoys wearing high heels, even though I'm already an inch taller than my husband. Adonai doesn't mind, so I feel free to walk tall and feel beautiful in tall shoes. If he had a complex about it, I would totally have a complex about it. Having a supportive husband has been an amazing gift in the aging department.

So there you have it. I'm getting older... but then again, WE ALL ARE! It's a fact of life. Something to embrace. To age my friends!

Children's Hospital

It was just a routine doctor's appointment. I walked down that colorful lobby corridor toward the directory, and I almost totally lost it. “Hold it together Kelly; this isn't our sentence... yet.”  

Children's Hospital is an AMAZING organization. As a student at BCOM, I spent every Tuesday night as part of my Christian Service volunteering at the Minneapolis Children’s Hospital. I'd hold babies who just needed love, play with kiddos who just needed interaction, sit and watch TV with teenagers who just needed someone else to hang out with, or if I had the sniffles, I wouldn't go near the kiddos and I'd stay downstairs in Volunteer office and do all sorts of administrative stuff (craft preparations and what-not) to help out. And by visiting Children's month after month I got to see how they approached hospital care for kids. How they made the glummest of circumstances sunnier. And I conclude that it is truly one AMAZING organization.

And then our friends had little Jaeden 2 months early, and he was admitted to the Children's remote NICU at Good Sam here in Phoenix. They had a private room and a place for mom and dad to sleep so they could be near him. The set-up was fantastic given their situation, which was one I was too familiar with having had to wait 10 days for Natalia to come home after her stint in the NICU on our side of town (not at a Children’s facility). So again, I was impressed by how great Children's Hospital took care of their patients.

Being such a fan, you’d think that visiting their campus for some test results would be no big deal right?

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It was just a routine doctor's appointment. The Children's Hospital campus was really large and had a lot of buildings. I wasn't sure where to park to be close to whichever building we were going to. I hated this. I hated having to drive across town for a bi-annual check-up, but it was the end of the year and all appointments on our side of town at our normal office were booked up. I reminded myself I was lucky to get in at all.

I drove around, did a u-turn and was just about to roll down my window and ask a nurse sitting on bench, evidentially taking a break or at the end of her shift, where building E was, when I saw it on the side of the building above her head. Whew, at least now if I could just find a parking spot, I knew where I was headed. But once I knew which building to go to, parking was easy too.

As we walked toward the doors I saw the long name of the building. I can't remember it now, but beneath the name listed that it was a treatment center for some pretty serious conditions totally unrelated to why we were there. I felt my nerves flicker though. I reminded myself, we weren't even going into the actual hospital, it was just a building on campus.

And then I walked down that colorful lobby corridor toward the directory, and I almost totally lost it. I HATE THIS PLACE. Fear gripped me and I imagined this place being our life. I imagined the appointment going badly. I realized that while I value everything beautiful that Children's Hospital has to offer that I never want anything to do with it ever again personally - not for my family. And my heart quickened and I almost broke into tears standing in front of the elevators, weak-kneed. So, I looked down at the happy toddler in my arms and reminded myself that this was NOT the time to lose it. “Hold it together Kelly; this isn't our sentence... yet.”

I pushed the button “up” and as the elevator doors dinged open, we simply walked in.

The office waiting room was fine. A little older and worn than I’d expected. And large. It had a play area for Natalia though which I thought was nice. I filled out the sheets and sheets of paper work, even though everything was the same. The nurse called us back after only a few minutes. Natalia weighed 23 lbs (I noted that she had weighed 24 lbs the week before, when we’d had the EKG done, but that’s probably no big deal, right?). After all the usual prelim stuff, we dressed Natalia in the cutest little green hospital dressing gown and laid her down for an echocardiogram. I kept her pre-occupied so she wouldn’t pull on all of the cords. She handled it all really well, which made it a lot easier on me.

And then we waited for the doctor. I tried to keep Talia busy and happy, but she was starting to get in a grumpy and temperamental mood. Her patience had worn thin, not from the tests, but from being confined to the little room.

Then the doctor came in. He asked a few questions. Then gave us the test results… everything was great - still fully operational. And the best part - we can wait two years before we need to come back for another check-up. I wanted to cry again. Two years? We went from every six months, to TWO YEARS between needing visits to monitor her condition. She’s still okay. Treat her like a normal health child, because she is one. THANK GOD!

DEEP DEEP sigh and a prayer of gratitude to my Lord. Children’s hospital won’t be our second home. I can take her and drive far away from this place and not worry about coming back any year soon.  

I am grateful for the services that Children’s Hospital provides… so long as they are for others.

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If you're wondering about Natalia’s condition, she was simply born with a bicuspid aortic heart valve. A normal heart valve is shaped like a Mercedes Benes sign (see the image below). It has three flaps for 1) allowing blood flow through and 2) to seal tight afterward so that there isn’t any “backwash” in the blood flow. Natalia’s valve only has two flaps. It is still fully functional at present, which means that she is fine and she may always be fine; it’s just something to monitor. Some people who have a bicuspid valve go their entire lives and NEVER have a problem– they don’t even know they have one (we only discovered her condition because of her other issues at birth, all of which she has fully recovered from). For other people the valve begins to weaken and after time will need to be replaced. The great news is that as humans, we do the most growing in the first two years of our lives. The fact that Natalia has had no change as far as her valve's functionality is a great sign. It makes the likelihood of her needing surgery in the next 10 years a lot less.

Image courtesy of http://www.aorticvalvereplacement.net/aortic-heart-valve-disease-causes-%E2%80%93-congenital-acquired.html

30 Second Prayer Model for Healing

Day one of our trip and as the plane descended into London, I suddenly felt intense pain and pressure in my sinuses. Yikes, no wonder you aren't supposed to fly when you're sick. Not that I was sick; I was fine before we left. Perhaps I had some sinusitis or something that I hadn't realized. I bought some Sudafed (the good stuff you can't by over the counter in the U.S.) at the London airport and was able to make it on the next flight leg without too much trouble.

The next day I was a little stuffy and had a bit of a headache. By Monday, even though I was taking Sudafed regularly, I'd had no improvement. I could breathe a smidge from one nostril and that was it, plus, I still had a sinus headache. Oy, what a great time to have my sinuses acting up.

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Pastor here had been teaching his young church leaders a 30 second prayer model for healing. It's not a magic formula, but simple Biblical truths that are put into a format that can be used by the church body to glorify God and bring others to know His name.

Adam was given dominion over all the earth, but forsook it when he sinned. Jesus died a perfect man, so death had no hold on him. He took the keys of dominion back from hell when He rose from the dead.  In the book of Revelations it says that in heaven there will be no more tears or pain. We live in the already, but not yet. Jesus has come and fulfilled somethings, but we won't see the full fulfillment until He comes again. So, right now, we have authority and dominion in the name of Jesus - it is a shadow of what will be > illness and death still exist, but so does healing.

Matthew 28:18-19a "I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, go..."
John 14:12-14 "I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done and even greater works, because I am going to the Father. You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. Yes, ask me for anything in my name and I will do it!"
Mark 16:16a & 18c "Anyone who believes and is baptized will be saved... They will be able to place their hands on the sick, and they will be healed."

The 30 second prayer model for healing is based on these truths. Keep your prayer short and sweet - all the excess, all the extra words are just to help our faith anyway. Pray in the name of Jesus, for that is the name by which we have authority, and so that the person being prayed for knows where the power is from (it's for sure not from these human hands). Bind the affliction specifically and pray that it be gone. Amen. Then ask the person if their ailment was a 10 on a scale of 1 - 10 before, what would they rate it now? Tell them they should be honest. It's not me doing the healing so I won't be offended if there is no change or if something gets worse! Okay, if the person isn't totally healed, perhaps the healing process has just begun. Pray again (or have someone else pray for them). Re-rate the ailment after the second prayer. If the condition is still not fully healed, again, maybe the healing is just started and the person can always receive prayer again next time. But no matter what our faith is that God is faithful to keep His promises and there is hope in Him. Our hope is that the person receiving prayer will see God working. This is a wonderful evangelism tool.

I love this prayer model. I think as Christians, so often we pray and don't expect anything to happen (we pray because we should). We pray and don't ask the person we prayed for if anything has changed. Or we pray and hope for healing, but then if the person isn't totally instantly healed, we're disappointed. This prayer model makes my faith stronger because it looks at the Biblical principles that give us basis for what we ask. And it realizes that healing isn't all or nothing - that there can be progressive healing. God heals in His timing. Some of that won't be realized until we are in heaven, but some of that really can be realized in the here and now. Amazing.

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Soooo... we're here for 2 days and Pastor teaches us this prayer model and encourages us to pray for one another. I share my little condition and members of the team pray for me - a simple short prayer. Afterwards, I could breathe through the one nostril and the headache felt a little less, but was still there. They prayed for me again. I could clearly breathe through both nostrils (seriously, the change was instant and I'm sitting there breathing in and out through my nose, enjoying the complete openness of my nasal passages) and again the headache was a bit less, but still there. But man, was it nice to just breathe! About ten minutes later, I realized that the headache was gone. God healed my symptoms that very morning, and I haven't had any more congestion this entire trip. Praise the Lord.

The same happened the next day with some serious tummy trouble. I got Delhi Belly - boo. :(  I was rushing to the washroom a lot, even woke twice in the middle of the night to take care of business. The team prayed for me that morning and seriously, from that point on, my tummy was totally fine.

And I'm not the only one. Other people on our team were healed as well.

What a wonderful God who blesses us with tangible ways to see His goodness and faithfulness.

I encourage you, have faith! Greater is He who is in us, than he who is in the world.

India Update - The Poor and the Injustice

I'm stuck here, not by the fact that there are so many poor, but by the injustice of it all. You see, you can't really even help the poor, unless you are VERY strategic.

This woman with a small child on her hip is one of many who will come and tap tap tap on your car widow when you're stuck in traffic. If you happen to make eye contact, she won't leave. If you say no, she won't leave. If you help her, all the others may swarm your car asking for aid too (and in Delhi, the traffic is so gridlocked that you may be there for a while). And if you help her, you don't know if she'll get to keep any of it for her and her baby or if she has to give it to someone watching. And mothers with babies are only some who tap tap tap. Then there are the children who perform between the cars hoping you'll roll down your window and just give them something. 

This family lives in an underpass. Daily cars scream past. You can see the little ones without clothes in the back. They have a bucket you can't see for taking baths and a small fire and pots to cook on. This is their, dare I say, home. And even though money goes really far here, I still can't roll down my window to give. It's dangerous when you're sitting in traffic and literally have no place to go if something were to go wrong. 

This is quite common - people on the side walk with their little stove. She might be selling small goods to get by, but when she's tired she'll take a nap here on the street-side. Just walk around the poor.

And of course, there are those who sleep anywhere they can, because they have nothing. 

But what makes me mad is not being able to help. We walked out of a restaurant on Monday and there was a woman on the walkway with a scale. Her way of making a living is to swat and wait for people who might pay a few rupees to get weighed. I commend her for finding a way to make a living instead of begging. I wanted Adonai to go and get weighed, just so we could help her. We were advised against it because truly, you don't know if she gets to keep any of the money. Even amongst the poor - CORRUPTION! How can you steal from the least of these? But it's such a reality.

At the train station the children mob us begging. Carl offered some snacks that he had and was turned down by one kiddo. He just wanted the money. Others were happy to take it, but not all. And why aren't these kids in school?!

There is HUGE value on education for some. It's almost difficult to get a job with only one degree because India is so well educated. But among the poor, there is no value. You have to test into school. Christian organizations have set up tutoring to help children place. Government schools aren't well regulated though as far as curriculum and testing, so sometimes the teacher only has a monitor watch the class while they go  in the back and play cards. There are private schools, some are expensive, some are very affordable and they offer top-notch education. But even the government schools have something to offer - the kids do learn English (which knowing would help them get a better job here). But the parents would rather have them working than be in school. Income is more important than education, and so the cycle perpetuates itself. Joyce sat for 2 months, 8 hours a day teaching a girl the basics in math and reading so that she could place into school. The girl placed at 4th grade. She attended for a few weeks and then stopped going because her mother would send her to work cleaning houses so that the mom could take on more houses to clean. Needless to say, Joyce was furious.

I love Mukesh's school. He works in a slum and parents send their kiddos to their Christian school, knowing what it is, because it's only for a few hours and the kids are getting value out of it. Learning the basics and some of them have gone onto real school. You see, not all help is balked at. 

There are ways to help the poor here; you just have to be strategic about it. You have to be conscious of how and when and where you help, especially as a Christian. But I want to give instantly - even 20 cents would go far, and it kills me that I can't. 

But then I am thankful for people like Pastor and Mukesh who live here and know the right ways to poor out and truly help the poor. To give fish when needed, but to also teach how to fish. To offer prayer and healing in the name of Jesus, when silver and gold can't be given. Who poor in day over day with love. 

Our church did an early Angel Tree for the children in the slums here. Yesterday we packed up 93 backpacks that will be given to the children at Christmas. Each child will receive a backpack, new shoes, socks, a sweater, a beanie, a lunch box, a pencil case, and three small toys. This all cost roughly $12 U.S. Back home, we could maybe get just the backpack for that price. And what a blessing it will be to the kiddos!!!

 So, as frustrating as it is that there are so many poor, and there is so much injustice, it's encouraging to know that there is still hope. That people here are making a difference and know the right way to do so.

India Update - Church in the Slums

With some of our sisters.

Last night, we went to Pastor Steven's church. We left after dark so that our presence to the surrounding area would be less obvious. Even though it isn't required for women to cover their heads here, the girls on our team did to draw less attention to our white-selves being in the area. You see, Pastor Steven's church is located in a structured slum.

Our taxi driver dropped us off where the road ended. We walked via flashlight across the railroad tracks. Through brush. Over refuse. Past a child defecating freely in the open (because there are no bathrooms anywhere). We walked to a small one-room building the church rents out. There is no a/c - just two slowly oscillating fans. The ceiling is made of sticks and something like burlap. Mats are laid across the floor to give a place to sit. 

All of the attendees at the church are women, except for two blind man, and one other. 

And they are each so beautiful. 

Jeeze, we are so spoiled in America. We have everything, light shows, and bands, money and possessions. Yet we bore easily. We don't seek God in most things. And our faces too often show disdain.

During the service time.

These sisters had NOTHING and yet, they had EVERYTHING.

I've never seen such passion. Their faces were beautiful, but truly their countenance is what was shinning. These sisters in Christ were fervent in their worship and their prayers. 

Kristen sharing.

Crystal sharing.

Kristen, Crystal, Eb, and Pastor all shared a word. Then the church prayed for us! What an honor!!!! I couldn't understand a word they were saying (this slum was comprised of a South Indian population and they all spoke Tamal), but it was powerful. We then broke into groups and prayed for them... I didn't know how to ask for prayer requests, so I just went for it, but thank goodness our God can pass language barriers. 

Baby Lerika wearing her Dora shirt.
Mama is on the left.

After service, we provided a snack and just hung-out a bit. There was a sweet little baby, maybe 10 months old. She had on a Dora the Explorer shirt and reminded me of my baby. Her name was Lerika. A set of sisters spoke some English and chatted as best possible with us. They couldn't believe how OLD we were (ha! They were 16 and 17). They all pulled out their cell phones (hilarious) and took photos with us. Sweet spirited sisters.

Fellowshipping after service

I felt very privileged to be there last night. And came across this passage which dawned whole new meaning having seen real poverty in that moment:

"You know the generous grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. Though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, so that by his poverty he could make you rich." 2 Corinthians 8:9

This morning my heart tugged in a new direction. I was reading Hannah's prayer in I Samuel 2. Here are verses 7-9 which are my prayer for these sisters: 

"The Lord makes some poor and others rich; he brings some down and lifts others up. He lifts the poor from the dust and the needy from the garbage dump. He sets them among princes, placing them in seats of honor for all the earth is the Lord's and He has set the world in order. He will protect his faithful ones..."

My heart was screaming this morning trying to figure out how to help them. Could we visit again and take more food? What could we do. But the tragic truth is that so often here helping actually hurts. To give too much would cause them harassment by others. So I am left with the resolve that even if I can't given them anything tangible at this point, I can remember to pray for them and know that inside they are already truly rich.